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Function: strpos
File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Router.php
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Function: libraries
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Function: __construct
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Function: require
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Function: include_once
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Function: require_once
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Filename: drivers/Session_files_driver.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: _ci_load_library
File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: library
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Function: libraries
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: initialize
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Filename: drivers/Session_files_driver.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Filename: drivers/Session_files_driver.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: _ci_load_library
File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: libraries
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Function: initialize
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Modules.php
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Filename: drivers/Session_files_driver.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: library
File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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Function: libraries
File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Modules.php
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Function: include_once
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Loader.php
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File: /home/blogs/public_html/tierkreishoroskop.com/application/third_party/MX/Modules.php
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Function: require_once
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Dies ist wohl die urkomischste Deutung deines Sternzeichens, die du je gelesen hast.
Schütze
Das Abenteuer liegt dem Schützen im Blut. Schützen lieben die Vorstellung von einem Monster unter ihrem Bett und schlafen am liebsten mit Albträumen. Sie würden lieber einen qualvollen Tod sterben, als ein ausgeglichenes Leben führen. Sie sind geborene Entertainer und einsame Klasse als Transvestiten.
Weiterlesen
Schützen lieben es laut zu provozieren. Sie waren oft auf der Waldorfschule und tanzen den Gegenspieler in Diskussionen einfach weg. Sie tragen beleidigende Aufschriften auf ihren Jacken und machen gerne Essensschlachten in Fünfsternerestaurants. Der Schütze ist der geborene Nicht-Schwiegersohn und er sollte deine Eltern niemals kennenlernen, wenn du an ihnen hängst.
Als Widder bist du unglaublich optimistisch. Du wirst dich nicht von Herzensbrüchen unterkriegen lassen. Deine Lebensfreude ist viel zu groß um von einem Kerl verbrannt zu werden.
Trotzdem kann ein Schütze nicht nicht heiraten. Außerdem isst der Schütze gerne bis er in Ohnmacht fällt. Er neigt zu spontanen verrückten Aktionen und Freunden, die obdachlos sind.
Steinbock
Der Steinbock ist der Streber unter den Sternzeichen. Er arbeitet hart und man kann sich auf ihn verlassen. Genauso auch auf seine Langweiligkeit. Mathematik ist sein Lieblingshobby was erklären dürfte, warum alle um ihn herum einschlafen. Alle Politiker sind natürlich Steinböcke.
Ein Steinbock ist wie das verrückte Kind einer Jungfrau und eines Löwen. Steinböcke folgern daraus, dass sie deswegen überklug und anziehend sind. Aber eigentlich sind sie nur Korinthenkacker, die alles zu eng sehen. Sie sind wie Kakerlaken und überleben alles, auch wenn sie es nicht sollten.
Steinböcke lieben es zu lesen, aber nur, weil sie nach Fehlern in der Rechtschreibung suchen. Sie tun immer beschäftigt und zeigen sich in der Öffentlichkeit nur mit Smartphone am Ohr. Ein tieferer Lebenssinn ist dem Steinbock fremd, denn da ist zu wenig Statistik dabei. Sie sind geborene Fälscher und Betrüger und werden deswegen meistens verhaftet, wenn man sie erwischt.
Diese Sternzeichen sind total konfliktscheu – laut Horoskop
Was ist deine Meinung ?